Baxter had been waiting fifteen months for someone interested in fostering or adopting him.
The problem? He answered ‘Yes’ to a question when he entered the foster care system.
Vincent arrived a few minutes after one p.m. to pick up Baxter and Mike at Groveland. As he walked in, Mrs. Mayhew greeted him.
“Mr. Choi! Welcome. Are you here to pick up the boys?”
“Yes, when they’ve finished their lunch and finished saying goodbye to the other boys. How are you, Barbara?”
“I’m good, as usual. We’ve had some turnover during the almost two months since you met Baxter. How’s he doing?”
“Rob and I love Baxter. And we are proud of him. He’s courteous, intelligent, and smart….” She’d looked askance at what he just said and held up her index finger. He explained. “Being intelligent and being smart are two different things,” he said. “That’s something I’ve learned as a high school English teacher. If you’re intelligent, you can think and reason about things and find other ways to solve a problem. Being smart means you can apply your intelligence to specific situations. For example, a kid is smart because he knows he should always cross the street in a crosswalk, but he’s also intelligent because he also makes sure he’s crossing with the walk signal and that the oncoming traffic is going to stop for him.”
She stopped and thought for several seconds. “Thinking about a few boys here at Groveland, I can understand that difference. Those are interesting definitions. I’ll be sure to remember them.
“How about Mike? How is he getting along with his foster parents, the Stewarts?”
“I’d say very well,” Vincent replied. “We’ve gotten together with the Stewarts a few times already. When the weather was warm, we had them over for a barbecue, and the kids went swimming. We had dinner with them the evening after Baxter’s adoption was finalized. They are a very nice couple, and it’s easy to get along with them. It’s also obvious that they love Mike, and he loves them.”
“How about Baxter and Mike. Are they still friends?”
“Baxter and Mike are best friends. Rob and I think it’s important for kids their age to have a best friend.”
“I agree,” she replied. “How do Baxter and his sister — I don’t remember her name — get along?”
“Baxter and Elizabeth get along like they are best friends, too. They help each other all the time. They don’t have any disagreements or arguments. In fact, they relate much better than my sister and I did when we were that age.”
“My, that’s interesting,” Mrs. Mayhew said. “I had three brothers and two sisters, and we argued and yelled at each other all the time. Maybe Baxter and Elizabeth get along so well because there was no background of sibling rivalry in their pre-teen days.
“Baxter was always very helpful around our facility. I assume he’s the same at your home.”
“Yes, he is. For example, Baxter told us that when he lived with his mother, he used to do the cooking during the week because she got home from work late. He’s teaching Elizabeth how to cook; she claimed her cooking skills were limited to burning water.” Mrs. Mayhew laughed.
“They usually fix lunch for us when we’re home on the weekends. He said he cooked the turkey at Christmas when he lived with his mother, and he’s eager to roast our Thanksgiving turkeys with Elizabeth’s assistance.”
“You said turkeys, plural. Are you expecting a big crowd?”
“There will be twenty-one of us, so we’ll have two turkeys. Baxter is excited because this is the first time he will have any relatives other than his mother. It’s like he’s inherited an extended family. I hope it won’t overwhelm him.”
Mike and Baxter walked into the reception area. Baxter waved and called out, “Hi, Pop! There’s no hurry. We’ll be ready whenever you are.”
“I’m ready now, boys.
“Barbara, it was nice having a chance to visit with you.”
“Please come back when you have an opportunity. We enjoy visits from foster and adoptive parents and their boys, and hearing about how everyone is doing.”
On the drive home, Baxter and Mike told Vincent about their presentations and how the boys had lots of questions for them. Mike told him what they’d had for lunch. Baxter grumbled, “A typical Groveland lunch. I think they need to improve their lunch menu.”
When they got to the Choi’s home, Mike and Baxter watched some college football games on the TV in Baxter’s bedroom. When they showed games between small schools that they’d never heard of and were from other parts of the country, they got bored. So Baxter set up his PS4. They played NBA 2K19 Anniversary Edition Basketball. It was fun, but not the same as actually shooting baskets.
“Next time, let’s go to my house,” Mike said. “I’ll ask my dad to help us improve our shooting, especially free throws. That’s where I need the most practice.”
“That sounds great. What are you doing next Sunday? I’m open.”
Mike checked the appointment calendar on his phone, then grinned.
Baxter looked at Mike. “You know, I never told you what we’re doing for Thanksgiving. My new relatives are coming for dinner. There’ll be twenty-one of us in all, including my dad, my pop, Elizabeth, and me.”
“Whoa, that’s a lotta people!”
“I know. And I don’t know any of them except the three of us — and me, of course. I’ll be meeting seventeen new people, and four of them are cousins my age. It’ll be sort of strange. The only relatives I had before were my mom, my grandmother who died, and some relatives in Canada that I never met and who weren’t able to adopt me. The only relative that I ever knew was my mom. Meeting so many relatives is going to be scary. I hope I don’t forget their names. I hope they like me.”
Mike grabbed Baxter’s shoulders and shook him, then grinned. “It’s not going to be scary. Don’t worry about it. You’re a likable guy. A loveable guy because I can tell that your dad and pop and Elizabeth love you. And you know that I love you, too. Your relatives will see that, and they’ll love you, too. Just relax and you’ll be fine.” He let go of Baxter, and they sat down. “So, what are you having for Thanksgiving? The usual turkey and stuffing and gravy, etcetera?”
“Yup. You might not believe it, but with Elizabeth’s help, I’m going to roast the turkeys — we’ll have two turkeys — and the two of us are making the cornbread stuffing and gravy, too.”
Mike stared at Baxter; he looked like he didn’t believe what he’d just heard. So he asked, “Really?”
“Yup, really. I roasted the turkey every year at Christmas when I was living with my mom. She had to put it in the oven and take it out because it was too heavy for me to lift. I was only ten years old when I roasted a turkey for the first time. I found a recipe in the Times for how to make turkey gravy, and it came out great. I’ve still got that recipe. The only thing was, my mom had to do the carving. I didn’t know how, and I still don’t. For our Thanksgiving dinner this year, my dad’s going to show me how to carve a turkey.
“What about you, Mike? What are you doing for Thanksgiving?”
Mike replied, “My grandparents, my dad’s mom and dad, are coming over on Thanksgiving day. They live in El Cerrito so they’ll go home that night. My mom and my grandma are fixing the Thanksgiving dinner, and I’ll help. We’re eating at around four o’clock.
“My mom’s sister and her husband are coming here are driving up from Burbank. They are arriving the Tuesday before Thanksgiving and returning home on Sunday. The Stewarts have two guest bedrooms. Aunt Julia and Uncle Greg are staying in one of the guest bedrooms. They have twins, a boy, Luke, and a girl, Laura. They’re thirteen and are staying in the other guest bedroom. It has twin beds.”
“That’s interesting, we’re eating at around four o’clock, too,” Baxter said.
“Vincent’s sister and her husband are coming here for Thanksgiving from Pasadena. They’re staying at the Holiday Inn Express. They have identical twin boys, Jason and Jordan, who are also thirteen. The twins are staying in our guest bedroom until Sunday when they return home.
“Vincent’s parents live in Eagle Rock; I guess that’s close to Pasadena because they’re coming here with Vincent’s sister and her family. They’re my grandparents on my pop’s side of my family.
“Rob’s parents live in Dublin, and his grandparents live in Danville. Since that’s so close to us his parents are bringing his grandparents on Thanksgiving morning and they’ll go home that night. His grandparents are my great-grandparents; that’s just amazing!
“Rob’s brother and his wife and their three boys are driving here from San Diego and will get here on Wednesday. Timmy is three years old, Chuck is fifteen, and Grant is fourteen. They’re staying at the Marriott and leaving on Sunday.”
“You know,” Mike said, “we should get together with the cousins and do something interesting while they’re all here.”
“What things could we do?”
They talked about various options. Baxter opened his laptop and entered them as they thought about things to do.
“Okay, I think that’s enough. Let’s go check with my dad and see what he thinks.”
“Okay.”
Mike and Baxter walked to the guest bedroom. His dad and Elizabeth were there.
“We just finished getting the guest bedroom ready for the twins,” Elizabeth said, “putting clean sheets on the bed, emptying two drawers in the dresser, and making room in the closet.”
“Hi, Baxter, Hi, Mike,” Rob said. “Do you guys need something?”
“Uh-huh, but if you’re busy, Mike and I can talk to you and Elizabeth later.”
“We’re finished, so now is okay. You want to do it here or in the family room?”
“How about the family room,” Baxter suggested.
They went into the family room and sat down. Vincent was there and he turned off the TV. “I guess this is a family discussion, including Mike,” he said.
“Yes, it is. Mike suggested that we should get together with his cousins and our cousins and do something interesting while they’re here. What do you think?” Baxter asked.
“What kind of things were you and Mike thinking about doing?” Rob asked.
Baxter read from the list on his laptop. “If there’s no rain, we could go hiking. Depending on how much exercise everyone wants, we can take a walk on the Iron Horse Trail, or go on a real hike to Old Borges Ranch or Black Diamond Mines Regional Recreation Area.
“We could go to the Lindsay Wildlife Experience museum and see some of the wild animals they rescued — if they’re open; we’d have to check.
“Friday’s Black Friday, the first big shopping day before Christmas, so if they’re interested, we could walk around downtown Walnut Creek and take a look at the shops and department stores and maybe even do some shopping. If we do that, we could also go to the library to show them that statue that looks like someone saying ‘Shh!’ with their finger over their lips, meaning don’t talk loud in the library.
“If it rains, we could go see a movie.
“All of this depends on the weather and what everyone would like to do. Another thing is, someone would have to drive us to places we can’t get to by walking.
“We’ll try to think of some other things, especially since Elizabeth might have some good ideas.”
“How many cousins are there?” Rob asked.
“There are nine teenagers; seven boys and two girls. We’re all between twelve and fifteen. We didn’t count Timmy because he’s only three years old and, unfortunately, won’t be included in the cousins’ group.
“Dad, Pop, Elizabeth, what do you think about our suggestions?”
“Those sound interesting. I suggest that you make it a joint decision once everyone is here. Thanksgiving morning might be a good time to meet with the teens and their parents. How’s that sound?” Rob suggested.
“Mike, can you come over first thing on the morning before Thanksgiving and bring Luke and Laura to meet with my cousins?”
“I think I’d better call my dad. Okay?”
“Sure,” Vincent said. Rob and Baxter nodded their agreement.
“Baxter, is it okay if I use your bedroom?”
“Of course. Do you want me to print the list of things we might do so you can read it to your dad?”
“Yeah, that’s a good idea.”
They both went to Baxter’s room. He printed five additional copies of the list and handed one to Mike, then he returned to the family room, where he gave copies to his dad and pop and Elizabeth.
Mike returned. “My folks think this is a brilliant idea, so it’s a go. Meeting here the morning of the day before Thanksgiving is okay, too. He told me he’ll drive the three of us here then pick us up to go home. He’ll phone either of you to work out what time we should have the meeting of all of our cousins.”
“So, Baxter, when do you want to do whatever activities your group selects?” Vincent asked.
“Either the Friday or Saturday after Thanksgiving or maybe both. It depends on the weather and what everyone would like to do.”
“Okay,” Rob replied. Vincent nodded his approval.
“I’ll go to my room and try to think of some other things to do,” Elizabeth said. “We should expand the list, and include some things the three of us girls would like.”
“After we update the list, I’ll print enough copies to give them to everyone tomorrow morning,” Baxter said.
Mike’s dad came by to pick up Mike. The two boys hugged, and he and his dad left.
The Choi family went to Counter Burger for dinner. Baxter had never been there, and he couldn’t believe all the things that could be added to a burger. Even though he would never order one that way, he could’ve had a burger with a fried egg inside!
Baxter liked the different add-ons and toppings that would make a burger exactly the way he liked them. A half-pound burger cooked medium with spicy guacamole, a thick slice of tomato, thick-sliced bacon, and extra sharp cheddar cheese on a toasted ciabatta roll with thousand-island dressing and romaine lettuce. And their fries! Thin and crunchy on the outside and like a baked potato inside. He had no idea how they could do them that way. This was his new favorite place for burgers.
Rob looked at Baxter’s order form. The combination he’d selected sounded good, so he reached over, took the order form, and copied the checkmarks onto his own order form, then returned Baxter’s form.
When they brought their orders, they concentrated on eating.
“I think this’ll be my favorite burger. But sometimes it would be fun to experiment with different add-ons and toppings,” Baxter said.
When they got home, they watched a movie on Netflix. Baxter was tired, so he took a shower, brushed his teeth, and went to bed.
The alarm woke Baxter at eight a.m. It was two days before Thanksgiving, and Baxter was eager to help with preparations for the family dinner. It was also the day that Vincent’s parents and his sister and her husband would arrive; that meant he’d meet his identical twin cousins.
Baxter took a quick shower, brushed his teeth, got dressed, and walked into the kitchen. It was eight-thirty and everyone sat down to a breakfast of blueberry pancakes with real maple syrup and bacon.
After breakfast, Rob said, “We have a lot to do to prepare for the twenty-one of us who will expect Thanksgiving dinner in a day and a half.” With that, Baxter and Elizabeth did the cleaning up.
“Have you heard from your folks or your sister?” Rob asked Vincent.
“Yes. I just got a text from my sister. They picked up my folks and left their house at nine-fifteen and are on their way. Steven said they should be here around three-thirty or four this afternoon,” he said.
“I suppose it depends on traffic, doesn’t it,” Baxter said.
“Yes,” Vincent replied. “Driving from where they live in L.A. takes between five and a half and six hours to get here. Driving two days before Thanksgiving means there might be more traffic on Interstate Five, so it might take longer.
“They said when they get here, they are going to stop at the hotel first to check-in and drop off their luggage. Then they’ll call and will come here.
“Baxter, when they get here, you’ll meet my folks, my sister and her husband, and the twins. You and Elizabeth can help the twins get settled in the guest bedroom and make sure they have everything they need. Then my parents are taking all of us to dinner tonight.”
“Do you know the restaurant where they’re going to take us?” Elizabeth asked.
“No, they said it will be a surprise.”
“Maybe Chinese? Or Japanese?”
“Could be. We’ll find out when they arrive.”
“Do they know Walnut Creek and the restaurants here?” Baxter asked.
Vincent shook his head. “I don’t think so. But it’s easy enough to go online and search for ‘Best restaurants in Walnut Creek.’”
“Or, ‘Best Chinese restaurants in Walnut Creek’ Elizabeth suggested. “Baxter, do you like Chinese food?”
“Yes, and Japanese and Thai. Especially Thai, because it’s spicy and I love spicy.
“Where’s dad?” he asked.
“He went to pick up the turkeys. He ordered two sixteen-pound birds. He should be back soon,” Vincent replied.
“Where’d he get them?”
“Whole Foods. They have fresh turkeys. By that, I mean, they aren’t frozen solid like most supermarkets sell them.”
“I love turkey,” Elizabeth said.
“Me, too,” Baxter added. “Is there anything we can do before Dad gets here with the turkeys?”
“Yes,” Vincent said, nodding. “We need to make the cornbread for the stuffing. Let me get the recipe.”
He went to the desk in the counter next to the refrigerator. There were several three-ring binders. He chose one, opened it to a tab, and handed that page to Baxter.
“If you’ve ever made cornbread, you’ll find this recipe is different. The batter has turkey stuffing herbs and spices. For the liquid, we’ll use chicken broth mixed with buttermilk, so it holds the cubes together. It won’t be as thick as regular cornbread, only about one inch. After it’s baked and cooled, it’s cut into one-inch pieces. Then it’s put on a baking sheet and goes back into a 200-degree oven for ten minutes to dry so it won’t fall apart or won’t turn into crumbs. Then tomorrow, we’ll mix the cornbread and other stuffing ingredients and bake it just before we eat.
“We have all of the ingredients, and doubling this recipe will make enough stuffing for everyone. It’s cooked in casserole dishes, not inside the turkey. It’s healthier that way.”
“Okay,” Baxter said. “I’ll get started with the assistance of my assistant.” He pointed to Elizabeth and grinned because of what he said. “You want to get started?”
“Yup. Remember, I’m the one who burns water, so you’ll have to make sure I don’t mess up.”
“Trust me, you won’t burn any water today, and you won’t mess up, either. I’ll be helping you.”
“What do we do first?” she asked.
“First, I’m going to make two copies of this recipe, one for you and one for me, then I’ll put the original back in the binder and put it away.
“Second, we’ll find and pull out all the ingredients for the cornbread.
“Third, we’ll put the ingredients in the order they’re listed in the recipe.
“Fourth, we’ll preheat the oven to the temperature that’s in the recipe.
“Fifth, working together, we’ll get started.
“Sixth, we’ll bake the cornbread. And so on.
“Seventh, we’ll make the stuffing tomorrow using the cornbread and the rest of the ingredients.
“How’s that sound, Pop?” he asked.
“Very well organized. If you have any questions, let me know.”
“We will,” Baxter replied, and Vincent left the kitchen in the capable hands of his two kids.
Baxter returned with the copies of the recipe and handed one to Elizabeth.
“Thanks,” she said. “I’ll get the ingredients that are easy for me to reach. You can get the ones that are too high for me. I’ve got a question. Are you always this neat and organized?”
“Usually. It prevents a lot of mistakes to have things organized and keeping them neat and in sequence.”
They took about ten minutes to find and organize the ingredients. They didn’t need some until Thanksgiving Day when the dressing would be finished and go into the oven. Still, it took nearly an hour and a half to complete the steps to make and bake the cornbread.
“Why don’t you ask Pop to come and take a look at what we’ve done,” Baxter said. “I’ll start putting the spices and stuff away. I’ll rinse the bowls and other things we used and put them in the dishwasher, and I’ll hand wash those that won’t fit.”
“Okay. I’ll dry and put away what you’ve hand washed. Then I’ll get Pop so he can see the finished cornbread.”
When everything was put away, she returned with Vincent.
“We’re done for now,” Baxter told him. “Where should we put the cornbread cubes?”
“I’d let them sit for an hour or so, then Rob or I will figure out where to store them. They really look good. Did you taste them?”
“Yes, they are great!” Elizabeth said. “Why don’t you try a couple?”
He did, and he agreed they were delicious.
“Anything else we can do?” Baxter asked.
“Yeah, like maybe eat some of the pumpkin pie,” Elizabeth said, followed by a giggle.
Vincent grinned, “It’s difficult to eat if it hasn’t been baked yet!”
Fifteen minutes later, Rob arrived with the turkeys. “That store was really crowded!” he said. “One is a couple ounces lighter than sixteen pounds; the other was a few ounces heavier. The difference is negligible, so they can both take the same time when we roast them tomorrow.
“You can tell they aren’t frozen,” he said. “Press on the top of one of them. You’ll see that it gives and doesn’t feel hard and cold like an ice cube. They are still cold, but above freezing.”
“I see what you mean. What are you going to do with the turkeys now?” Baxter asked.
“We left room for them in the refrigerator.”
After Baxter put both turkeys into the refrigerator, he asked, “Are we going to have room for everything else?”
Vincent nodded and said, “We will… maybe.” That made Baxter and Elizabeth laugh, and she commented, “‘Only time will tell.’ One of my teachers says that all the time. It’s funny.”
Baxter had other questions. “What else can we do? Do we need to wash any dishes or glasses for tomorrow? The table in the dining room doesn’t look big enough for all of us. What are you going to do?”
Rob explained, “Our dining table seats five on each side and with the extensions can seat one on each end; that’s ten people. We have a second table, the same as the one in the dining room, in the storage room in the garage. That means we’ll have room for twenty people. Timmy, in a booster chair, will sit at one end of one of the tables next to his mother. That takes care of twenty-one people. We’ll temporarily move the two sideboards in the dining room into the kitchen.
“We have ten chairs in the dining room, plus six in the kitchen. There are eight more in the storage room, so we’ll bring in five of those. Timmy’s booster seat will fit on any of those chairs.”
Rob walked into the kitchen. “I heard you discussing the dining room. That’s one of the things we have on our agenda to do today. All the things your pop described have to be moved today. So, this sounds like a job for the four of us.
“Elizabeth, how about you and Baxter move the two sideboards from the dining room into the kitchen. Vincent will tell you where he wants them.”
The two kids walked into the dining room. Baxter lifted one end of a sideboard. “They don’t weigh that much.”
“I know. I helped Pop move them when we got the new tables and chairs last year. Let’s start by asking him where we should put them.”
“Good idea. Lead on!”
Vincent decided putting both of the sideboards in the kitchen would take up too much room. He didn’t need to use them; he had the kitchen table and the counters, and that would be adequate.
“What’s it like outside?”
Rob overheard him. “I was outside checking the storage room. It’s cool but not cold. It’s not going to rain; I heard the weather forecast this morning.”
“Okay,” Vincent said, “why don’t you two take them both out on the patio. Make sure they won't be in the way if someone wants to go outside.”
“Okay, will do,” Baxter said. “Ditto,” Elizabeth added.
“Let’s figure out the easiest way to move the sideboards to the patio,” she suggested. They decided that taking them from the dining room through the family room and outside through the sliding glass doors was the easiest and most direct route.
They returned to the dining room. “When we carry them, you can take the front or back end. I think if you’re at the back, it’ll be easier for you. So I’ll pick up the front. Let’s give that a try and see if it works.”
It did work, and both sideboards were moved to the patio in about ten minutes. They returned to the dining room.
“Next, we should figure out where the other table needs to be placed,” she said. “There’s a tape measure in the kitchen desk. We can measure the width of this table, and calculate how much room is left, divide it by four, and that will tell us where to put both tables. I’ll get the tape measure.”
She returned with the tape measure, a pad of paper, and a pencil. Baxter sketched a layout of the dining room with two tables and twenty-one chairs. They did the measuring, and Baxter added the width and length dimensions to the sketch. Then they measured the width of the room, eighteen feet, and he wrote that on the sketch.
Baxter did the calculations and added them to the sketch. He showed Elizabeth. “This way, it looks like everything is going to fit… I think. We will need to do some tests once the second dining table and the chairs are brought in.”
“Cool, this looks good,” Elizabeth said. “But how are we going to move the table that’s already in the dining room, and then move the second table from the storage room? These tables are big and very heavy.”
“Those are good questions,” Baxter said. “I’ll make a couple copies of the sketch, then we can ask Dad and Pop if there’ll be enough room.”
Their fathers were in the family room.
“My sister just called,” Vincent said. She said they’re at the hotel and will be here in a few minutes.”
“That’s great,” Elizabeth said. ”And Baxter and I have the dining room plan to show you.”
Baxter handed them copies of the sketch. “This is what Elizabeth and I figured out for setting up the tables and chairs. It will handle all twenty-one of us, including a chair with a booster seat for Timmy.” Vincent and Rob studied the sketch.
Rob looked up. “You two did this by yourselves?”
“Yes,” Baxter said.
“You two are amazing.”
“I agree,” Vincent said. “I think their sketch shows that the seating will work.”
Elizabeth asked her questions about moving, testing, and adjusting the position of the tables.
Rob replied. “Good questions, Elizabeth. We’ve hired an outfit that specializes in in-home furniture moves. They’ll be here this afternoon. While they are here, we can experiment, so we’ll be sure there’s enough room for people to sit and to be able to get up without bumping into those in back of them or into a wall.”
“Can we help move things in from the storage room, like the chairs?” Baxter asked.
“I think we’d be in their way. Let’s let the professionals take care of it,” Rob said. “When they’re moved in, they can reposition the dining tables, and we can adjust the positions of the chairs if it’s necessary.”
“When are the extra dining table and chairs going to be put back in the storage room?” Elizabeth asked.
“They’re going to come back on Friday to move everything back the way it was.”
“What if it doesn’t work?” Baxter asked.
“Then we’ll put one table in the dining room and the other in the living room. That’s not ideal, but if that’s what we have to do, that’s what we’ll do.”
They heard the doorbell. “That’s probably my folks and my sister and her family,” Vincent said. All four members of the Choi family got up to greet the arrivals.
Baxter was nervous. ‘What if they don’t like me?’ he thought. Then he remembered what Mike had told him about being likable. He hoped Mike was right!
If you enjoyed reading this story, please let me know! Authors thrive by the feedback they receive from readers. It's easy: just click on the email link at the bottom of this page to send me a message. Say “Hi” and tell me what you think about ‘Baxter’ — Thanks.
This story and the included images are Copyright © 2019-2025 by Colin Kelly (colinian); the original image is Copyright © 2013 by dsharpie | iStock #5934524. They cannot be reproduced without express written consent. Codey's World website has written permission to publish this story and has licensed use of this image. No other rights are granted.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
This story may contain occasional references to minors who are or may be gay. If it were a movie, it would be rated PG (in a more enlightened time it would be rated G). If reading this type of material is illegal where you live, or if you are too young to read this type of material based on the laws where you live, or if your parents don't want you to read this type of material, or if you find this type of material morally or otherwise objectionable, or if you don’t want to be here, close your browser now. The author neither condones nor advocates the violation of any laws. If you want to be here, but aren’t supposed to be here, be careful and don't get caught!